Thoughts of a step-mom

''You are not my mom!!" Words that me and any other step-mom in the world dred to hear. It is not enough that we are forced to accept that our spouses once belonged to another woman, but we have to accept that the children that we will help raise and have in our home belong to her as well. No matter what. Over the last two years there have been some days that this has been easier to accept and come to terms with than others.

I have accepted the fact that 'my boys' will always first be the children of another woman and I will never be their mother, but that does not mean that I cannot be their mom. I am very blessed with 3 wonderful 'step-sons'. They are a blessing to in my life and even thought there are days that I long for my one bedroom apartment, I would never trade them.

Skyler: The oldest (Sean's mini-me) a.k.a. "butt-nuggett" He is 12 going on 16. Skyler .....how do I describe Skyler? He is the social butterfly of the family, yet the one that can't seem to be without me very long. On our cell phone bill a couple of months ago he managed to rack up over 5000 texts. He is notorious for sneaking into our room and trying to lay between Sean and I on the bed. He was the one peeking out of the window when Sean and I had our first kiss and screamed, "oooohhh grossss!! They're kissing!!"

Zachary: The middle-est.a.k.a Zachary Michael!!! Zach has a personality all his own. He is the one that you have to keep track of because he flies under the radar, doing his own thing. Keeping himself 'out of trouble' by pleading ignorance. Zach is the ladies man. Last year I was at the elementary school with Pokey for 'animal day' in Skylers class. Zach knew I was going to be there and asked if I would find him so he could see his puppy. He was out to recess, so when I tried to find him on the playground I needed help. It came in the form a cute little girl who wanted to pet the dog. I asked her if she knew Zach, and she not only knew exactly who I was talking about, she knew exactly where to find him. Needless to say she was off and found him without a problem. Figures....the girls always know where to find him. (just like his dad.)

Jordan: The youngest--a.k.a Monkey butt

He and I have had a rocky ride. He had just turned 5 when Sean and I started dating, and he will be the death of me. Sean claims that he and I have exactly the same personality. We are both always right and you can not convince us otherwise. He is obsessed with his hair and facinated with mohawks. We have our own nightly ritual. Every night he has to have a snack before going to bed. Every once in a while he lets Sean give him his snack, but that is about as far as it goes. He will lay awake waiting for me to come tuck him in. I have to give him a kiss on his forehead, make sure that he does not need a 2nd snack, get him his waterbottle and start his music. Priceless.

Each one of these boys has their own special place in my heart. They make all the trials of being a 'step-mom' worth it. It does not matter that they do not share my biology....we share something more important...